Tuesday, August 10, 2004

So Much For Today

It was not the greatest day, although it could have been worse. I was tired all day because I sat up until 1:30 this morning writing to AZ. I hope what I said gets his head out of his ass. I think I used those words too. Keep in mind that I love AZ very much as a friend. Sometimes I love him as more than a friend but for right now, I'm all up in the friend thing. We've watched each other make some pretty foolish choices and one in particular on his part I watched go down and wanted so much to step in and say, "Man, you're fucking up. This chick is psycho." But I didn't because honestly, I didn't think he would have listened. He debates otherwise. Anyway, when things finally came to a head, I told him what I had thought and he asked, "why didn't you say anything? You're the third person to say that." So, from that point on I decided to tell him what I saw and how I saw it in order to save him the time and expense and bullshit of figuring it out. And you know, that never fucking works. Nevertheless.... I am putting my best bitchy foot forward and telling him like it is... about him. No, he's not on drugs, he's not an alcoholic or any of that crap. By outward appearances, he looks quite normal and acts quite normal. Ahhhh my children, but what lies beneath?? Some phrases I used included the aforementioned "get your head out of your ass," "Wake the fuck up dude," and "why are you so fucking stubborn?" I'm a great friend aren't I? Trust me, if I use those phrases it means I love you and care about you and am "tired of watching you piss away the best parts of yourself. " He's done it for me, although he didn't have to use any words, he said all of that and more with just one look. I feel as though I'm just returning the favor, one friend to another. Although, I have to say, it sucks. The whole situation just sucks and I have no idea if I'm making things better or worse. Guess I'll find out next week. I had a lunch date today with the Bald UPS Guy. Sissy was so excited for me until she found out it wan't the muscular skinny Bald UPS Guy but the older, heavier Bald UPS Guy. Lord, you should have seen her face... I felt like such a loser. The lunch date was okay. The conversation wasn't all that great. He seemed like a nice guy and he's been flirting with me forever. BUT... here's where the guys can roll their eyes and tell me to get a clue. He asked when he could see me again and I told him next Tuesday. I seriously have to get my ass in gear at work, my boss is not a happy man, which means, I'll be eating in the office. Second, this is my weekend with my son and I don't go out unless its a special, special occasion when I have him. Third, on the following Monday, Gabriel, as I will now call Hyper-Boy (please make note of it) has a doctor's appointment. Now, Bald UPS Guy says, "What, I can't see you sooner than that??" Uh... no. That irritated me. I don't play games and I'm not coy. If I said "next Tuesday" I meant, "next Tuesday." I gave him the appreviated version as to why that is as I didn't feel as though after one lunch date I owed a formal one. I just hate that. Now, I know that some guys are sitting out there going, "but he's just interested in you." Well, get a clue Mr. Interested, have some respect for what I just said. Second, I picked up the newspaper and noticed when the first WVU game is going to be and mentioned I needed to get cable so I could watch the games without snow on the screen. He said, "No you don't, you can just watch the game on my big screen TV." Uh... no. Guess it didn't dawn on him that I may have my own set of friends that I watch football with. I don't like being rushed and that made me feel rushed. I don't know, it just hit me the wrong way. Like he's taking a lot for granted. I just wasn't feeling it. There was no spark. I did agree to have lunch with him next week as I have been encouraged to "give it a try." I will go with an open mind and just be myself and see what happens. Okay, I'll try to do those things but if I don't feel comfortable after the second date, I'm calling it off.
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    Blogger Queenie said...

    Good luck.
    But you already know.


    8/10/2004 11:05:00 PM  
    Blogger Aimee said...

    Life's too short and he sounds pushy. I say get cable and blow him off.

    8/11/2004 01:02:00 AM  
    Blogger Zelda said...

    I think it's cool that you don't judge by looks. I don't think you're a loser for it.

    8/11/2004 01:35:00 AM  
    Blogger Sloth said...

    I agree with Queenie. Sounds like you've made up your mind already. For my part, there's nothing ickier than a guy getting too clingy too fast. Seems like you may feel the same way.

    8/11/2004 04:00:00 PM  
    Blogger Leese said...

    I agree with everyone here. The guy sounds pushy and clingy. Don't waste your time on him.

    8/11/2004 04:59:00 PM  
    Blogger Phoesable said...

    I've had several friends angst over this kind of thing -- "He's kind of rushing things, but he's a nice guy and I guess I should give him a chance." I don't know, seems to me pushy men for whom you have lukewarm response are not worth it. Something's wrong with their radar that will have other symptoms, too. If they're not smart enough to read your ambivalence and try a new tack -- are they really going to float your boat? I agree with Sloth and Q, Sister Spirit: you already know.

    8/11/2004 05:01:00 PM  
    Blogger evilsciencechick said...

    icky! wash mr cling off if there's still no spark after second lunch.

    and if you can't tell a friend to get their head out of their ass, who can you tell? that's what friends are FOR, dammit!

    8/11/2004 05:16:00 PM  
    Blogger Traci Dolan said...

    Ladies -- (funny, no guys commenting???) I have to say that Qeenie can say the most by saying the least and I have to pretty much concur. One of the ladies I work with saw him sitting on the bench across from my office at about 5. Luckily, I get off work at 4:30. That was kinda creepy... trust me, I did not bowl him over with my rapier wit and crushing intelligence at lunch so it must be the boobs. Frankly, if I hit it off with someone then I'm much more willing to concede on when I can see them. Yes, just another sign.... sigh.

    8/11/2004 05:48:00 PM  
    Blogger Tsarina said...

    Listen to your instincts, that's what they're for. Good luck!

    8/11/2004 06:25:00 PM  
    Blogger Phoesable said...

    the guys are just disappointed to think you went out on a date with anyone.

    8/11/2004 06:42:00 PM  
    Blogger Traci Dolan said...

    Tsarina - Now why didn't I think of that???? I'm all about instincts.

    Sister Moon - LOL!! I cracked up when I read that and it did wonders for my self-esteem... thanks!!

    8/11/2004 06:48:00 PM  
    Blogger Jenn said...

    I have to agree with the rest of the girl Inanna. If you just didn't get that feeling like this guy is someone I actually want to watch football with it isn't worth your time. Move on men are a time a dozen sweetie!

    8/11/2004 07:38:00 PM  
    Blogger Me said...

    Hey, good for you for giving the guy another chance, but I'd probably dump him after the second date, too. If you don't have a good dialogue with someone, chances are slim to none (and Slim just left town) that you have anything in common. Besides, clingy guys give me the damn creeps... like they're some strange Norman Bates kind of guy...

    8/13/2004 05:54:00 PM  

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