The Beaufriend (Part I)

I just want to say that I'm useless in relationships. I suck at them. Well, I used to suck but things have gotten better with the Beaufriend. I love this guy for all the right reasons. There's a lot of things I like about the Beaufriend. He's not stuck up my ass all the time for one. We have our thing and then we each have our own thing. This was freaky wierd at first but I like it. Not to say I wouldn't mind spending a little more time with him...but, whose to say that may not increase over time. I'll either deal with it or I won't. I also like the fact that he doesn't talk my ear off after sex. Kiss my back, snuggle your sweat-soaked body against mine (its not real sex until both of us are drenched) but don't talk my damn ear off. I got nothing to say, I said it all with my body bud. I get real jangly after sex, it gives me a high and if I don't just lay there and chill I'll be up and ready to run a marathon for hours. And what a sweetie, he's actually learned to wait out the 10 minute, 5 sec, 2 millisec rule for showering afterwards. And I didn't even have to say anything. He's not a sunshine-blower either. He's not constantly telling me how beautiful and hot and what a(fill in the boring blank) I am. So when he does say something I know he means it. He told me the other night "you look so beautiful and are incredibly hot." Then he went home because he was tired. Huh? He told one of my gal pals that I was "awesome." I can handle that. The last time he said anything like that was in January when he called me "adorable." I still have the e-mail. He didn't try to get me into bed the first, second or third date, nor the fourth, fifth or sixth. Took him three weeks to kiss me, three more weeks to kiss me with tongue and two more weeks after that to make "the move." We're into music, politics, travel and photography. He's very intelligent and passionate about the things he believes in. I'd like to think I'm one of those things he believes in. He's a Cancer, I'm a Scorpio, water signs and what he calls "emotionally complex." I know he perplexes me. He told one of my buds that he was "scared." Join the crowd. His history is as bad as mine. I think I'm incredibly lucky to have found him again. I say again because we've known each other for 10 or so years, or rather, known of each other. One thing he has told me is that back when, during our "early years" that he thought I was "cold." ME? Maybe I was. I thought he was adorably cute at the time and he intimidated me because of that. But that was a harsh, cold time in my life and I do not look back on it with fondness. (And wherever you are D.S., I hope you get necrotizing faciitis of your dick. I hope you rot in the your own hopeless, degrading hell. I hope if you ever set foot in prison they all know what a disgusting excuse for a human being you are. I hope they gouge your eyes out for ever looking at me. I hope they fuck every orifice of your body until you pray for death. I hope death is slow.)