Friday, September 03, 2004

My Rings

I wear three rings. On my right middle ringer is a small diamond cluster which belonged to my Grandma Jessie. Beside of it on my ring finger is an emerald helenite (which I bought on my trip to the NW) flanked by diamond chips. On my left middle finger is a gold filigree ring with a ruby in the center which belonged to my Mama Madeline. These are the rings I wear but they are not the rings I used to wear. When my Grandma Jessie died in 1986, my Grandpa Joe decided he would take her good jewelry, as she had tons and tons of costume jewelry, and pawn it. That's right, pawn it. My dad gave him $50 for the bag and brought it home. Inside was my Grandma's wedding set, which included double solitaires and a band set with diamonds, and a 20 or so carat peridot. My Grandma smoked unfiltered Camels so at that time and anytime you saw it on her finger it appeared to be a smoky topaz. The peridot was believed to belong to my great-grandmother. The edges were worn and the setting was old although not antique. My mom cleaned it up and gave it to me. It was a huge ring and unusual. As I had never had much of an opportunity to get to know my grandmother, I was very proud to wear it. The wedding set sat in my mother's jewelry box for close to 15 years. One day she decided to have it appraised and was shocked to learn that one of the solitaires was worth $3000.00, the other about $2000.00. She had them re-set in earrings and had the diamonds from the band re-set in a different band. Over the years I accumulated additional rings. I had bought a ruby with diamonds as a gift to myself from Nate as the ruby is his birthstone. I also purchased a large smoky topaz, since that is my birthstone, and a sapphire surrounded by diamonds which I planned on giving to Nate's sister when she got older as that was her birthstone. Most of the jewelry I bought at a local pawn shop or put on layaway as, I'm not rich. The topaz and my peridot meant the most to me though. I wore my rings all the time although I was horrible about taking them off and laying them down wherever. It was my house afterall.... but they would come up missing and I would root and hunt around and there they would be. I added another ring when The Drunk-Boyfriend asked me to marry him. The ring was CZ but you couldn't tell the difference and it was quite pretty. Then one day, they all disappeared. Vanished into thin air. The last time I remember seeing them was around Halloween of 2001. I mentioned to TDB about it and he gave me a hard time saying that I was forever setting them down, how I didn't take care of my things, and how I was always losing stuff. As time has gone by I'm convinced that my rings were stolen, probably by him and he pawned them to pay for something he wanted. Perhaps if I had figured that out a while back I might still have the opportunity to find them, at least the peridot. If I can have nothing back but one, it would be the peridot. I've decided to go looking for them, at least to quiet my own mind that I've done something more than to just pray and cast spells. And its not only that... its that I feel I let myself down and a couple generations too. I feel the fool and nothing will quiet that in my mind. I feel responsible that I have let something so valuable and personal slip, literally, from my fingers. TDB is not the only suspect either... sadly. I had a habit of taking my rings off at work and laying them on my computer station because they would slip and slide when it was cold. Although I can almost say with certainty, I didn't go home without them. I would have felt naked. I wear these rings and appreciate the feel of the bands around my fingers, but I still feel naked.
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    Blogger Phoesable said...

    good luck on the hunt, sister spirit... somehow I have confidence that you're going to find at least some of them again.

    9/03/2004 12:48:00 PM  
    Blogger Jack said...

    Very nice post. As always. Enjoyed it.

    9/03/2004 02:07:00 PM  
    Blogger Traci Dolan said...

    Spirit Moon -- I'm hoping and praying...

    Jack -- Okay, which Jack are you? Are you Texas Jack? If so, stop reading blogs and get to gambling!!! If not.... uhhh who are you? Jack Smythe? Jack of the Beanstalk? Jack of Jack and Jill?? I'm assuming your Texas Jack... so get thy carcass to the Bunny Farm or Ranch or whatever!!!

    9/03/2004 02:13:00 PM  
    Blogger Cattiva said...

    Very well written Inanna! Hopefully you'll find them snugly hidden somewhere in the house.

    9/03/2004 02:46:00 PM  
    Blogger Traci Dolan said...

    Catt -- the most I can hope is to find them snuggled in a nearby pawn shop.

    9/03/2004 02:52:00 PM  
    Blogger Outburst said...

    Things usually have a habit of turning up on their own schedule, often right when you truly need them the most.
    I can't count the number of times I've pulled out a fall jacket from the closet for the first time when the temperature dips and I find a 20 dollar bill in the pocket right when I'm flat broke, the times when you're sitting alone at home, wishing not to be so alone and a nice email message pops up from someone that you're really glad to hear from or the times you decide to dig under the sofa for no reason other than something to do and you find something you thought you lost long ago.
    I hope they turn up as I know it seems the sentimental value far outweighs anything you might get for those rings in a pawn shop.
    Years ago I once tried to sell an ugly gold ring my mother gave me for my 16th birthday during a poor point in my life and foudn that they were only willing to give me a measly sum for it that would have come in handy, but I couldn't bring myself to sell her token of love that easily. The ring still sits in a box in my bedroom, barely used, and not for years but it's the thoughts behind it that matter more than any dollar sum.
    Chances are they will turn up where you should've expected them to be but never thought to look.

    9/03/2004 05:11:00 PM  
    Blogger Kari said...

    hey, i liked the post and wish you luck searching for your precious rings!

    9/03/2004 05:40:00 PM  
    Blogger ~Jessie said...

    Oh, this made me feel so sad for you. I truly hope you are able to recover your rings!

    9/03/2004 08:29:00 PM  
    Blogger Tsarina said...

    I agree with everyone else; I am adding my good wishes to your search.

    9/04/2004 11:48:00 PM  
    Blogger Me said...

    Like everyone else, I truly hope you find at least the peridot, Inanna. Things have a way of finding their way back to us, and any vibes I have to help you recall your lost items are in the universe. Good luck, sweetie!

    9/05/2004 12:35:00 PM  
    Blogger Esther said...

    I hope you find the rings.
    I had my mothers wedding set and both rings were stolen. They're irreplacable, not because of the money value, but the sentimental value

    9/06/2004 05:32:00 AM  

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