# 400...

And its a wild one... get in, sit down, shut up and hold on. My mother called me Saturday after I had left a message for her. I saw a familiar name in the obituary section and thought it might be a friend of their's. Since they don't get the evening paper until very late, I thought I would give them a head's up. It ended up not being who I thought it was but she launched into a blow by blow of the past two weeks and I diligently and duly listened to all of her gossip about people I don't know. I was talking to her about Nate and his defiance, when she said, "Oh, well I've tried talking to him, encouraging him. I told him that the man is the head of the house and the breadwinner." That's all it took. I saw ten shades of red and jumped down her throat so far I saw what she had for dinner. I was LIVID. Now, I understood the comment Nate had made to me: "Wow Mom, I don't know what you would ever do without Daddy..." Huh? WTF? I wanted to say that I didn't need his father, never had, never would but I said instead, "No, Nate, I think you meant, what would you ever do." He gave me a funny look at the time and now it all came home to me. Then my Mom tried to backtrack and explain that she told him she only wanted him to do well in school so he could get a good job so his wife could stay home with their children. I asked her how she thought it would affect him if his wife made more money than him or didn't want to stay home? Where is the respect for women who work? And how DARE she undermine my authority by saying that MEN ARE THE HEAD OF THE HOME?? "But I told him that in your instance that you were the head of the house." I guarantee you this... what Nate heard, based on what has gone on around here, is "Men are the head of the house." She has issues with the fact Nate still sleeps in my bed. She had the gall, the fucking nerve, to ask me what I was going to do when he turned over against me in his sleep and had an erection. I told her that my son started having erections upon birth and I in no way intended for him to be sleeping with me when his erection was bigger than a spring mushroom and I thought she was disgusting. Nate and I have talked about him moving into his bedroom. He knows its coming, as soon as I get all the crap out of his room, and he accepts it. Gee, wonder if I should tell Sperm Donor to stop kissing Nate on the mouth, hugging him and telling him he loves him? For the record, my friend Markus in Germany, still greets his mother, sister and father with a kiss on the mouth and a hug and he's 34 years old. He even greets me that way because he sees me as a family member. And he's just as much a man as men who don't. My mom spends all this time bitching about how emotionally withdrawn my dad and brother are... small wonder when forced into the role of "man." NO emotion, NO feelings... only strength. Well, I got news for you and her. I'm one of the most emotional people I know and I'm still strong as an ox. I sat down with Nate this evening and had a short but stern talk with him. In no uncertain terms I told him that I'm the boss. Period. I told him what I expect from him and I told him what the consequences are if he does not comply and that regardless of how he thought he could outwit, out-talk, out-think, or out-manuever me that, I wrote the book. I'm tough and I'm stubborn and he does not want to go up against me. I said, "You are one smart little boy." And he asked, "Smarter than you Mommy?" I laughed and I said, "Son, I'll always have 25 years of life experience over you. Don't ever forget it." He got a sort of, "Oh shit, the gig is up" look on his face. When I told him that I had talked to his daddy and compared his behavior there to his behavior here, he at least had the good grace to look a bit guilty. Just goes to show that he knew all along and was just waiting for Mommy to get with the program and in a very succinct motion, put her damn foot down... hard. I guess he'll get me trained someday.

Now Serving # 399

That's right... number 399. My 399th post. Which is not right really since that includes pictures and posts that I wrote but didn't post. Since Blogger won't count anymore, I did. Yes, I do have better things to do. This weekend has been okay. I've been dealing with Nate and my sick cat. One of the kittens is ill with, I'm assuming, Coccidia. Nasty little intestinal parasite that most cats contract and build an immunity to without any problems. Stress lowers the immune system and obviously something has irritated Emmett because he's not doing so well. Amazing how a perfectly healthy, roly poly kitten can become a bag of bones in two or three days. He's on my lap right now, wrapped in a washcloth. He's been laying out by the furnace too. I've been trying to keep him warm because he's lost most of his body fat. He is eating and drinking so that's a plus. He's getting special meals with a vitamin in them and I've been watching him pretty close. Coccidia really can't be 'killed', it can only be thwarted momentarily by sulfa drugs until the cat has an opportunity to build the immunity. In the environment though, the only thing that can kill it is .... ammonia. So, I got two brand new litterboxes for everyone to use while I disinfect the others. Amazing how its just ONE. Always ONE. I'm not complaining. I would rather it be just ONE as opposed to all 11. MJ went home with Sissy on Friday. She was supposed to take Emmett but he was so sick I gave her the hyper, cranky one. One down, three to go. Nate complained loudly about giving the kittens away so I told him to pick out four of the other ones.... Needless to say, he decided we should give the kittens away. :o) Enough of that. Things I rarely buy at the store: Potato Chips French Onion dip Snacks containing sugar Junk food in general Pop/soda/sugary drinks of any kind What I bought at the store: Potato Chips French Onion dip Raisin snack cake Donuts Guess what time of the month it is? I don't like salt very much, except... ahem, a certain salty thing but I cook only with a minimum of salt and I don't salt my food afterwards, unless its just really needs it. Speaking of food and diets... I've been researching diet changes for Nate regarding his ADHD. I guess for myself too. Still researching... Okay, I gotta go get Nate in the bathtub... work a bit and then get Nate in the bed etc. See ya later.

The Nate Update

I came by and everything had changed, who's blog was this anyway? Kick ass post btw! Sean Thanks Sean and glad to see you. I'll swing by your place soon for the update! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The donor could... hahahhaha! Home... **Snort** school.... Hahahahaha! Whew, that's rich! Ok, whew, ok, yeah... I'm ok. Got it under control now... **snicker giggle** Ahhh, that's like ME saying the donor could home school. Oh crap, I'm gonna start laughing again! This is why I chose the school for Em that I did--Nate, Zelda's kid, all the other kids who want to LEARN and aren't interested in fulfilling someone else's criteria. I'm going to go online and see if there's a comparable school near you. I'll email you, Sweetheart. Aimee You and AJ both mentioned the same thing... and as I told AJ, having Sperm Donor in anyway involved is disasterous. He does more harm than good. He has no patience and ends up pointing fingers and shouting and berating Nate. Like Nate needs it. I've looked into every program in this area.... nuttin'. More below. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- That is why I homeschool. I have one in front of the box, one behind the box, and the rest are at various different places inside the box. I have one visual, one auditory, and one verbal learner. We have so many different types around here it confuses me! lol. You can make them fix an IEP for Nate, specially worked for him, EJ has one, and it really helps him. GOod luck, and go show them what Nanner is made of! angi They like to pretend his under an IEP but it doesn't meet Federal guidelines. They hear "IEP" and suddenly everything we had discussed earlier is being implemented and then trashed. Wish I could home school. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I notice the same thing that Zelda does about our little girl. However, I think it's quite important for her to know society's "rules". That's just information she can use in the future to her own advantage the way she sees fit. So, I encourage her to continue to do what the teachers want while at the same time allowing her to learn on her own at home or with me. Jethro That's all you can do. There's nothing worse for a child's self esteem than to always be on the teacher's bad side. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Inanna threaten to sue them for failing to educate your son. They had a year to get him ready for the next grade and they didn't do their job. So they need to pick up the cost for his added school year. I know people this worked for. Trashman After careful consideration, this is not my chosen path, although I am considering action under IDEA. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I like your new template. Read Howard Gardner for good information on your conundrum. He created the theory of multiple intelligences and has an operation here at Harvard where they teach teachers how to respect different learning styles. V. interesting stuff. Sloth Thanks Sloth. I actually did a lot of research today and Gardner came up. So did a lot of other stuff. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why oh why do school districts do this to children and parents. I mean there has to be a happy medium here people! Have you thought about a Montisorri (sp?) environment? Kristin I talked to Montessori today Kristin. They won't accept him because he's too old and won't be able to adjust to the environment (regardless of the fact the Montessori environment has be recommended). -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I understand where you're coming from. On the 9th I go to the school for the final discussion w/my son's school about his delay and if he qualifies for special ed. I had to do everything myself as far as discovering he may have a problem. Otherwise, they just would have held him back and said "Oh well". I also had to be the one to put him in private tutoring, even though they should have started after-school tutoring as soon as they saw he was falling behind. Has the school sent you all the paperwork as far as your parental rights? Beckie Beckie, my best wishes to you and your son. I fear you will soon learn you are your son's one and only advocate. You know you can deduct stuff like that on your taxes??? Check into it for next year and this year too. (I think you have to itemize your deductions though). And they don't send information about my rights or Nate's... that would mean they are actually thinking of not trying to pull one over on less suspecting parents. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Even with the pidgeon holing they do now for education, which can be extremely frustrating, children are still so much better off in general. No longer is it common to hear of people failing multiple grades and not graduating from High School at the very least. I know it still happens but not on the grand scale that it was. Good luck, hon, i hope you get it sorted out! seven No offense Seven, but I might believe that if I didn't know that the teacher Nate has this year passed the Lonely Child with practically straight E's last year ... even in reading and math. That may be why I don't have a lot of confidence in this school. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Does Nate have an IEP? If not, GET HIM ONE-- insist the special ed team meet with you. Do not take no for an answer. They will use every excuse to get out of testing, because districts don't want to pay. If he's ADHD, it should be no problem to get him into the program. Special ed is not the stigma it used to be. It is one of the few ways children who do not fit into the box can receive a quality education. At that point, get his IEP to state that he must be taught in a style that he can understand. If the flipping school does not meet that standard, they open themselves up for a lawsuit- it is defiance of Americans with Disabilities. NOW, when he's in 8th grade, bring yourselves out here, and get his defiant little ass in my class- I enjoy the challenges, and I promise you, HE WILL NOT BE BORED!!! Good luck. Tsarina Tsarina, thanks for the tips and right now I'm willing to do just about anything. See below. I spent a shitload of time today reading more research on ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder). Nate does fit the criteria in some aspects... however he is very passive as opposed to aggressive. He has shit fittin' moments but for the most part, he is very passive, which makes him harder to "treat." I also spent time looking in the mirror asking, "Are you part of the solution or part of the problem?" Regardless of what the school does or doesn't do, Nate is still my responsibility. Everything begins at home. I ordered three or four books today on ADHD, ODD, and OTM. (The OTM is One Tired Mom). I came home and very calmly set down with Nate and talked to him about his defiance and the ADHD. He gets very anxious and talks alot when you talk to him about it. I talked to him about how I feel and how I felt as a kid and he agreed its hard to fit in. (Which he wouldn't admit before) I also told him that just because we're not exactly wired like other people doesn't mean we were wrong, it just means were special. I told him that you wouldn't expect a TV, a VCR and a PS2 to do the same things because they're wired differently, even though they all use electricity. He seemed to "get" that analogy. He also confided in me that he hasn't been able to do his #3 multiplication table and I told him that today we would work on it and I asked him whether it was easier for me to go over it with him verbally or on notecards and he said he remembered things better written down. So, now he's actually studying them sitting behind me. He likes the pink notecards. There's another book I want called... "Dreamers, Discoverers, and Dynamos: How to Help the Child that is Bright, Bored and Having Problems in School." No one book is going to have every answer or even the right things to do that will work for Nate but I'm hoping by amassing more knowledge that a self-made plan, made by the one who knows him best, will have more of an effect than just carting him off to a psychiatrist. Nate is naturally distrusting of anyone who wants to test him or make him talk about things. He's seen enough. There is no more influential environment than home. Time to get our ducks in a row and make all this medicine worth what I pay for it. Thanks for your encouragement and thoughts. And Tsarina, I still think you're the Number One Teacher of the Year.

Outside the Box

How is it my son is in 3rd grade, yet reads and comprehends on a 6th grade level, is failing? Well.. you see ma'am, he doesn't fit inside this little box that students should fit in. He's over here in front of the box. *scowl* I believe he may be a bit behind in math. Well, I'm sorry but see he doesn't fit inside this box. He's actually a bit behind the box. *sneer* He's a very visual learner ... We don't make concessions for learning styles... he'll need to be inside this box or we simply cannot educate him and you'll have to be the one to ground him and beat him into submission so he conforms to the standards of the box. Deviation from the box is not acceptable and he'll have to pay the consequences for being smarter and having a different learning style and basically operating outside the box. *stare.... drool drips from bottom lip* Federal law states that you must make allowances for his disability and how it affects his learning. We don't care what Federal law says because we'll find a way around it. You will make him fit into this box or we're going to make your life miserable and his too. So, just make him fit in the box. Fuck your box. We don't allow that type of talk around here... would you like to be escorted from the building, arrested as a terrorist and thrown in Federal Prison? Because we can do that too. I will not give up. I will not give in.

Writer's Block

Yay. I finally was able to kick around with Picasa, Hello, PhotoImpression, Adobe Photoshop etc. and got some pics uploaded to my photoblog for inclusion in my pictoral post. I don't feel like it now. Go look at the pics and guess the story leading into each one. Have fun. I am calm today. Perhaps it is my sleepiness which has drawn me into a mellow state of affairs. Thoughts wind among themselves like rambles of brambles and nothing seems to snag me. Nothing seems that important that I want to waste more than a moment contemplating it yet I find myself contemplative of my serenity. Its a feeling of Spring, when the March winds blow and the sunlight is finally warm again. The feeling of laying on an Earth that is still cold and shivering from winter's breath and warming it with our thoughts of Summer. Its been over a month since the Oak King wrestled the Earth from the Holly King and awaits the maiden Goddess to marry, knowing that each year he is destined to curl into her womb as a new babe while his brother draws us again into darkness. I check my three e-mail accounts and find my "Best of Beliefnet" newsletter. The headline? "Why The Dead Want Our Attention." I smiled. They are very good at linking other articles previously featured. Good and bad. I am reminded that there are many who do not believe as I do and they don't want anyone else to believe either. I am a healthy skeptic. Anyone who blindly follows will be lead astray eventually. I understand both sides of the mystery... the side that is skeptical and the side that knows how difficult it is to interpret the signs, the voices, the feelings. I could work on this. I could also take up ballet again. I nurture many things but my body never seems to be one of them. I also do not nurture what's over my left shoulder. Why me? I wonder what they want. They have to want something, right? I assume when someone taps me on the shoulder that they want something. The time, directions, to tell their family member they know she was going to name her child "Noel." Perhaps though, its the tap on the shoulder where someone hands you a dollar bill which fluttered from your pocket, a mitten, or a package which slips from the bottom of the pile. Maybe they want to give me something. Perhaps they would like a mutual aid agreement. You help me, I'll help you. "You tell people freaky things that make them look at you strange and we'll help you clean your house." "I was thinking more on terms of deep everlasting love and the lottery." "No." "Worth a shot." I was... what? Tagged. Yeah, tagged by Seven to answer something about music. So... Random 10 1. You Got Another Thing Comin' - Judas Priest 2. Jane - Jefferson Airplane 3. All I Ask Of You - Phantom of the Opera 4. Fantasy - Aldo Nova 5. Megalomaniac - Incubus 6. Slither - Velvet Revolver 7. Rock You Like A Hurricane - The Scorpions 8. Sure Know Something - Kiss 9. Night Train - G N R 10. Jack's Texas Music - Jack Total # of music files on computer: 11 Last CD you bought: "Contraband" by Velvet Revolver (linked at the right with the sexy silhouette) Last song you listened to before this post: "The Reason" - Hoobastank Name five songs you often listen to or mean a lot to you: 1. Don't Stop Believin' - Journey 2. Damned If I Do - Alan Parsons Project 3. Madelaine - Winger 4. Small Town - John Cougar Mellencamp 5. The Rose - Bette Midler I guess I'm supposed to pick other people?? Any volunteers? Oh well. I went to The Sound of Muzik blog today. I got there through Sigmund, Carl & Alfred, the irreverent blog with the heading: This blog is dedicated to the world of bloggers, many of whom exhibit more than mild symptoms of various personality disorders. If you have a blog, sooner or later, you'll be on the couch - Sigmund,Carl and Alfred. This is one guy who talks like he's three and he's calling the rest of us crazy? Its like everything else in Blogland, its funny, so who cares. Back to "The Sound of Muzik." He posted a list of words and asked that you make up new meanings. Here's what I came up with: Masticate: The act of spoon-feeding ideologies to a large group of people. dastard: The illegitimate child of a dyslexic. Grunion: a smelly Nirvana fan. Truckle: A large amount of cash Palimpsest: the reduction in the size of the male genitalia following the payment of Truckles to the mother of a dastard. Paralipsis: Congruous collagen injections. Oh look, I don't have writer's block anymore.

Testing

I'm trying to test out my new skillz... if I have any... Beaded necklace and earrings I made for AJ's daughter

Fudge!

I had a pictoral post planned and actually posted it last night but the pics needed re-sized and I'm pixel-illiterate and even frantic IMs to Seven last night at 2 a.m. did not fix the problem and I realized I would probably have to start over from scratch with re-scanning, re-sizing in my scanner software and then re-loading to Photobucket. BTW, the pics last night filled up the entire screen. I know you guys love me and all, but talk about up close and personal... geez. I was doing a pictoral because I have nothing to say. Mark it down. I got nuttin'. I have a multitude of thoughts swimming in my head and a myriad of emotions that I am not ready to allow to surface for the breath of air that they desperately need to live. (Maybe I do have something to say.) I don't want them to live... therefore I try to drown them in the bile at the bottom of my stomach. I told Green-Eyed Lady in an e-mail that since Kansas City, when I opened the Third Eye, I have been unable to close it. Its like they saw their chance and now refuse to back down. Then I'm faced with the shoulder tapping, *whisper* and I turn and look behind me, searching for the source, knowing its not back there or below me or above me... its inside. Its only my perception that they stand behind and a little to the left. Writing that makes me realize that I don't recall ever turning to the right when I feel "that feeling." T-Bird made a remark to me after I told her that I had pulled quite a few shots to the left and down when I went shooting. She said, "You ride the yellow too. You pull to the left when you drive." I hadn't thought of that before. I am the personification of right-brained. Maybe that's why I pull to the left... ??? Am I so right-brained that it affects the leaning of my body? That's not a serious question so please don't rack your brains... left or right. Another thing, I was talking to someone today who asked me to "read" them. I gave him the standard disclaimer, "You asked for it." I pictured him in my mind's eye and started "seeking," "searching," "scanning." It was like listening to a record played backwards... hits and misses. Which is unusual. I couldn't figure out why I was having such a hard time pinning down his energy. I realized later, it was because he was mobile. MOBILE! HA! His energy wasn't being absorbed and transmitted, it was bouncing. Now, that would explain how its easier through written word of any kind (IM, e-mail, letters) to "read," because they, the person, are stationary and the energy is concentrated. Probably. There are no definites. Ever. *Muse* *Muse* *Muse*

Shorts!

SHORTS MY ASS! No shorts here damnit! TWO degrees this morning when I woke up... UGH! Yet, a heatwave compared to Bangor, Maine where it was -29 with windchill and somewhere in Minnesota it was -56 or something. Pipes didn't freeze so I'm good to go. I AM FLYING TO BOSTON FEBRUARY 18TH!!! Why? Oh Why? Am I going to yet another COLD ASS place? My buddy Troy, JAG/Airman, is being re-deployed to the Middle East. Okay, actually he VOLUNTEERED because no one else in his office would. Either that's bravery, stupidity or boredom. I think its boredom. When I expressed my displeasure, he said, "What else do I have to do?" For someone who is going to join the ranks of another government agency with three initials that spies on people once his time is up in four months, I thought I had better deploy myself to the frozen Northeast and see him. It could be years before I see him again. :o( THINK OF ME... THINK OF ME FONDLY I went to see "Phantom of the Opera" this weekend with PC. He laughed at me because I cried. I hit him about the face and shoulders which caused him to laugh more. I think I will take Nate to see it next weekend. I would like him to have an appreciation for opera and this movie is INCREDIBLE. PC said he thought it was more moving and emotional than the stage version because we were "closer to the action." Then we went shooting. So, he laughs at me and then puts a .22 caliber pistol in my hand and then a .45. I'll post pics tonight. (Was this the smartest thing to do?) SEVEN Thanks to everyone for your thoughts on my new look. I sweet-talked Seven into it once I saw his design for Reama. Did a fabulous job didn't he? He's for hire. CHARMS I'm crazy about Italian charms now... the ones that go on the bracelets that Jamie got for us and brought to Kansas City. I want to have one bracelet completely for bloggers. I found several... "One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor" but then I found "I love Margaritas" and the State of Texas and "Who's Your Daddy" and "Twins" and a turtle, "I love shoes," "I love my Pug," "I love my Weenie Dog," "I Love S.F.," "No-Cal", "So-Cal," "All Your Bases Are Belong to Us," "Trailer Trash," "7," "I Love to Screw," "Spongebob," "100% Democrat" or "Republican," a celtic cross, "I love California," the Superman symbol and the word "Girl" and tons more, if that gives you any idea. Actually it would fill up almost two bracelets as I have a small wrist and can only fit 16 charms on. Plus, I found this AWESOME witch one!!! I must have it! I'm also getting one that says BLOGGER!! Another, MUST HAVE!!! Okay, now I must work...right after I hit some blogs...

All Over the Map!

Mardi Gras Goodness My cousin K.K. sent me a King Cake in celebration of Mardi Gras!!! Its beautiful and I don't have my camera nor any film but it looks just like this one. I will be posting some of her art work in the near future. (Its a cream cheese one... YUM!) Speaking of Mardi Gras... the special at the bagel shop was Cajun turkey and jalepeno cheese and someone told me they had a Mardi Gras parade around here somewhere... now they tell me. Heh. But I still got beads. Cold and Snowy Its cold and snowy here!! Three inches, not a lot, but enough. BUT! I am toasty warm thanks to Aimee, who was kind enough to sew my buttons that I bought in Kansas City on my coat. I haven't had any buttons on my coat in three years. Thanks AIMEE! *smooch* *poink* Frazzle Dancing Thanks for all of your advice and encouragement with Tall-Dark & Green. Like I said in my comments, I used to share every mushy-gushy gesture, every word, thought, feeling etc., then it all went to hell in a handbag. I'm still processing a lot of feelings myself. I was sitting at my desk this morning thinking "I'm scared." I'm trying not to think about the reasoning behind that right now. I'm on sensory overload. Could also be the fact there is so much sexual tension between us I want to throw him down, rip his clothes off, and just... you know. He's out of town though. Wha! And Thank the Goddess! No sex to interfere with my thought processes. No, I have no restraint. Forget it. The last thing I need is to confuse lust with any other emotion... although lust is nice. He lusts me too but we both realize lust isn't what keeps people together forever. Got to have something else. Luckily, we do. People At The Door I should say "Men At The Door," as, in addition to Alien, I have had a proliferation of those with penises pounding on my door. That didn't sound right. Anywho. My EX-boss called me at 11:30 the other night as I was finishing up an e-mail to Alien. Not that I've quit my job... NO, NO (more on the job in a sec). This was the boss that I hated from five years ago. Yep. He wanted to fuck me. Now, let me be real clear about how I feel about T.T. I. LOATHE. HIM. LOATHE. LOATHE. The reason for this is he made three years of my life complete and utter hell. Not that I didn't learn a lot and for that, I give him props. Otherwise, No. So I tell him, "T.T. before you called, I was horny and really wanting to get laid. I mean, really wanting some dick. And you just made me realize that I DO HAVE LIMITS!" Can you believe he didn't hang up on me??? Yeah, me neither! He practically begged me. NO, I did not have sexual relations with that man when I worked for him. Heh. Except I'm a lot more honest than Ole Billy Boy. No blue dresses in the back of MY closet. He said he's always wanted to do me. Well, want in one hand and shit in the other and see which one gets full fastest. I unloaded a lot of shit that's been hanging around in my mind for five long years. He did say that I was much more direct now than I used to be. Its called SELF-ESTEEM, MU-THA-FUCK-A!!! On to my real job. The Job With all the excitement of Kansas City, I forgot to mention I GOT A RAISE!!! And am I earning every freakin' penny of it!! I have been busier than a one-armed paper hanger in an ass kickin' contest. This is why you haven't seen me lurking about your blogs as normal. Yeah, between my case load, upcoming trial and this new medicine, shit, I actually WORK NOW! What a bummer! :o) Really? I'm thrilled. It makes me feel so much better at the end of the day. Now, to just get the shit at home together. And sleep would be nice. Ya'll have a nice weekend!

Let's Do "The Frazzle Dance"

Stand up. Push your chair back, give yourself lots of room. (I meant it, get up, off ya butt, push ya chair back...) Now. Extend your arms out to the side like you're a bird or something... ya know, with wings. Now bend your elbows and bring your hands toward your face like you're going to fan yourself. Check to make sure you have enough room. Rapidly vibrate your hands up and down until you feel a good breeze. Move from foot to foot with knees slightly bent (this takes pressure off the lower back) and then begin to move like you are stepping on hot coals... don't forget the hands, the hands must vibrate... Are you doing this? Now, say, "frazzle, frazzle, frazzle, frazzle, frazzle, frazzle, frazzle..." as fast as you can while vibrating your hands and hopping from foot to foot... it must be frenzied, like the hot coal thing. This is The Frazzle Dance. (I stole it from Slim the Walking Stick in "Bug's Life.") I do this when shit happens... good shit... bad shit... or to let people know, I'M FRAZZLED!! So, I'm frazzled. Ya know, life is I-RON-IC! (Please say that with an Australian accent...sounds so much better - damn! That reminds me that I didn't do any of my accents in Kansas City! Nor did anyone see my tattoo!! Focus Nanner... where was I? OH.) I-RON-IC. Now I sound like Tarzan (GOR-RIL-LA). If you don't know what I'm talking about go rent a Disney movie!! So, last week, I wrote this: I'm not sure how to break this cycle. Its not like I have men beating down my door to give it a whirl with. Hold on, someone's at the door... That's the irony... I say that... and... hold on... someone's at the door... suddenly the floodgates open, the Earth shifts track, the moon is full... hold on.. someone's at the door... Anyway, I distinctly remember telling Aimee or Katey or Celti or more than one, that perhaps I would meet my One in the hotel lobby. Tall, dark hair, green eyes... hold on... someone's at the door. But then I said this: I suppose I may use that as a mechanism to keep myself from being vulnerable and actually having to commit and be intimate in a relationship. Its the same thing with Lex, except he does it to me, which pisses me off, yet I have done it others, which pissed them off. Actually, I said this part first and then I said the other part. My point is... even if I did meet Mr. Tall-Dark & Green.. WTF was I supposed to do with him? Am I ready for that? So... what would happen say if I did meet Mr. Tall-Dark & Green for real. And he says, "Gurrrl, you are the most precious thing I've encountered..." Let's say I did meet Mr. Tall-Dark & Green... and we have this incredible connection... enough that I'm doing The Frazzle Dance. Enough that I'm sitting back wondering, did I really do something so wonderful as to deserve this? It must have been something pretty damn good. How did this happen? I asked with specificity didn't I? That's what I get... a gift from the Goddess herself. I do not turn my back on an opportunity. I have backed away from quite a few and this time, I didn't. I haven't moved. Not forward. Not backwards. In my "103 + 1 Things About Me" post, I said, "I have a fear of commitment because I have a fear of abandonment. My brain thinks if it isn’t committed then it can’t be abandoned." Its that I'm afraid to put myself out there and things not work out... not because "we're not feelin' it..." but because I'm an emotional cripple. I'm afraid of ruining it. I have no idea how to let someone into my life. However, I am more fearful of losing this opportunity than I am of what may come of it. I don't feel as though its a "now or never" thing, nor a "last chance" thing. I also don't see it as "therapy" or "the opportunity to work on shit before moving on to the 'real thing'." I'm just trying to see it in the simplest terms possible. Two people who have made a connection among all the people in the world and if its meant to be, it will find a way.

Back To Your Regularly Scheduled Blog

I have more pictures but I don't have any of them scanned yet and once they are I have to receive the "a-okay" from the KC-7 to post them. None of mine are that interesting anyway... oh wait, there is that one of Regan's boobies... Anywho. Sunday evening I was chatting with Lex who asked point blank if I "got any" while in Kansas City. Umm... no. Sorry, damnit I didn't. Now, he's been doing this thing where he flirts with me and acts like he wants a piece of this and then retreats and doesn't speak to me for a couple of days. Now, if you make me blush (and I don't mean my face) and then decide to, I dunno, IGNORE me, this is not the way to get into my pants. This is probably the third time in as many weeks that this has gone on. Damn. Why do people make me HAVE to be mean? Why do they MAKE have to stand up for myself? He may not get an earful but he will definitely be at the receiving end of my caustic tapping, typing fingers. Prick. Be up front about it... if you want to fuck, say it. If you want to perhaps have a relationship with me again, get your head out of your ass and say it. If you want neither and you're just fucking with me, go away. Like I have time for this. AZ called me... when was it? Before I left to go to KC. I blogged about it. Then he IMs me Monday night. This is unusual. We've chatted before but normally we start chatting and then he calls me. I'm still all good and fine with how things are. However, while in Kansas City, sitting in the back of the circling vehicle, fighting back nausea from car sickness, staring at the beautiful Kansas City skyline, I thought of him. I had an urge and desire to write to him. I haven't written to him in a very long time. I, at first, thought I wasn't going to say anything about what I was feeling or how my feelings had changed. That's what I do though... I let things sit and run through my mind and ponder and think and ponder more. Done pondering. I have no desire to hurt AZ in the least little bit. I know he's messed up in the head. I know he suffers from depression. I know a lot. I can't fix him but I can tell him where I see his life to be. AZ is not the kind of person that will come out and say, "I need you," but he will act "needy" in his very AZ way. This is what I was talking about in my "Reason, Season, Lifetime" post (December 15). It used to be if he felt me drifting, he would do something to pull me back... the hang on...the hope. I'm wise to that now and much wiser to know it has nothing to do with me as a woman or an object of affection or desire but as a friend. A friend who has put up and stood up. A friend, that no matter what an ass he is, has the capacity to understand and still be there. I wasn't sure I could do that and not "fall" back into my old mindset and hopes and dreams and desires, but I can. I started writing him a letter yesterday, using the above post as I guide of sorts and even quoted part of it. I'll try to finish it today, perhaps I'll post it for posterity, perhaps not. Two inches of snow fell this morning in the 15 minutes before commute and fucked up the roads. The Interstate was five miles an hour... so, I'm behind already. Happy Humpin' Day!

Okay, Okay, Okay

Geeez.. try to have a little fun around here... everyone got to have an attitude! KC PICS!!! And none other...

Jamie and her ginormous straight line map 

Pup's new look... sexy, sexy 

Katey! 

Jamie has skillz! She just put the camera up and took a picture. I didn't even have to crop it.  

KCBLOGCON2K5 

I GOT PICS!!!

I love pictures!! Don't they tell a thousand words?!?! Wait... are these the right words...?

Nanner at Lake Erie 

Da Nanner and Da Beanie... best friends X 20 years!! 

The ginormous yellow penis of Cedar Point! 

Eerie storm clouds outside my house 

KANSAS CITY!

Flying the Friendly Skies You guys know how special I am, but I didn't expect the security personnel to figure this out so quickly. Immediately upon arrival at my friendly neighborhood airport, I was detained before I could even walk through the first metal detector. My boarding pass was marked, "SSSS." Which means something like, "special selective service search," or in my case, "sit, shift, sulk, scowl." The most interesting thing about this was they didn't ask me any questions about where I was going or what I was doing. My first flight I sat beside of an interesting gentleman who was in town to discuss development along the New River Gorge ($300,000 to $1 million dollar homes). He was en route to Phoenix. My second flight from Cincinnati, I sat beside of the most adorable (fuckin' married!) guy. Had he leaned any closer to me as we approached Kansas City I would have smooched him (damn, I should have.) As I came through the vacuum tube (the gate), I was slightly nervous but more excited to see who was meeting me. Aimee? Celti? ACK! I saw both of them through the glass outside my gate. My first impression was how freakin' tall Celti seemed! I had to pee sooooo bad though (wasn't willing to give up any time with the darling next to me) that I almost walked into the men's bathroom. Bunsen had arrived ten minutes early and I was a few minutes late (I was supposed to arrive first), we just drove by and picked up her off the curb, again - I had no idea she would be as tall as she is. Of course, when you're the shortest one there, by 1/2 an inch, everyone is tall. Jamie met us at the hotel.. again taller than I expected. We Have Arrived The five of us headed for the Plaza and lunch. Katey and Pup were meeting us later. I ran off to the bathroom and heard the hostess come inside. I heard her tell the waitress who was primping in front of the mirror that she had just seated five ladies from all over the country and they were really cool. That was US!! She didn't serve us though, we had a wonderful waiter. This is when the storytelling/sharing/laughing/snorting/cutting up/teasing started and it didn't stop until... about one o'clock Sunday morning. Kansas City is a beautiful, beautiful city (they still had the Plaza Christmas lights up), the people were spitze friendly, but it was motherfuckin' butt fuckin' COLD! A balmy, bitter six degrees... it felt like a heatwave this morning when it was 19. A very nice guy asked if we wanted him to take our picture outside of Swarvoski... that's how nice the people were and really, how sweet is that?? Activities, Activities, Activities I'm sure you guys want to know what we did... We talked. We laughed. We snorted. We flashed. We ate. We drank. We shopped. We napped. Rinse. Repeat. I know what you really want to know though... so, who was the diva? Who was the Mom? Who was the brat? And who loved the boys? (HA! When pics are posted I'm sure ONE of us will explain.) And you want to know how we all got along and what our impressions were. Here's mine: Aimee Aimee has a very old soul but a very young heart. She's a planner, a list maker and pretty no-nonsense, yet full of nonsense. She's philosophical and we waxed poetic on Blogland over latte's. She laughs a lot and has the cutest snort! We made her snort a lot. Celti Celti was not quite as outgoing as I though she would be... at first. Yet, there's something about going to an adult toy store which tends to loosen a person up. Very friendly yet took a while to get the inner Celti to come out and relax with us. I could tell how much more relaxed she was Saturday as opposed to Friday which really brought out her sense of humor. Laid back and very easy to get along with. Katey Katey is absolutely so sweet, with this adorable Chicago-ish accent, and she seemed to smile all the time. I thought I would end up spending more time with her than I did, we didn't reallty get much face-to-face time but I know that we'll have other opportunities to see each other. Just a sweetheart. Regan Regan was the biggest shock. First, the height. I expected her to be about my height and she's much taller. Second, she's about as watchful as Celti but in a much quieter fashion. Very much a scientist. A lot of times she would just be sitting back, following the conversation, and suddenly she would open her mouth and this hilarious Reganesque speak would just come rolling out, she would flatten everyone with laughter, and then she would retreat again. Regan the Tsunami - pulling back and back and back and then releasing this ginormous mave of hilarity. Jamie Jamie also was taller than I had expected. Beautiful curly hair, quirky and fast witted, most likely to raise her eyebrow at you in a very cute, mocking fashion. But she can be downright serious and from meeting her I can imagine how her subtle yet biting sarcasm can go right over the heads of the people she deals with. Jamie is very youthful and its hard to imagine her being a mom, but then its not hard at all. Make no mistake about it, if Jamie puts her mind to something - LOOK OUT! Better yet, just get out of the way. Pup Very funny guy, wonderful accent, fantastic cook, hospitable, willing to wear bikini tops, let us ladies get freaky with "THE Pup" (Be scared, be very scared), rabid football fan yet the WORST FUCKING DRIVER!! If he were a cab driver, he would make a freakin' MINT! Why? Because he has to circle around a few times, like an old dog getting ready to lay down, before he gets in tune with his surroundings and the direction he wants to travel. It became a running joke... not to mention boobages and cleavages... yep. Love ya Pup! Da NannerPeach Yeah, what about me? I was disappointed that I was soooo tired. I hadn't had much sleep and I didn't want to take all of my Adderall. That combination really sucked for me. Friday, I felt like I was walking around in a fog. I did nap a bit and getting out in the bitter weather does have a way of waking you up. I really didn't hit my stride until Saturday night and then I did tarot card readings for Katey, Jamie and Regan, which totally wiped me out. (Sorry Pup and Aimee, next time.) I had absolutely a marvelous time. Putting a real voice, a real face and a real energy to them was just incredible. And no, no cat fights, no fussing, just a lot of huggin' and smoochin' and... well... you don't really need to know ALL that. Heh. Are We Lost? No, we're just not going the right direction... yep. So, we got a late start this morning since I had to shower and throw my shit in the bag and eat. I didn't even get to finish eating before we REALLY had to get on the road to the aiport. Both Aimee and I didn't follow our gut and ended up wasting precious moments getting ourselves going in the right direction (evil laughter from Pup). As we approached MCI, I was trying like hell to get a hold of someone at Delta to find out which gate I needed to be at, as, well, my flight left at 11:00 and we pulled up at two minutes til. Big Smiles! I wasn't worried... I was surpringly calm to think, "I'm gonna miss my flight." Nahhhh, I didn't. It was delayed an hour. Woot!! Oh whoops! Wait a minute!! Doesn't that bring me incredibly close to when I'm supposed to leave Cincinnati? My flight from Cincinnati had been delayed due to bad weather, ya know, snow, ice, bad winds. We landed, and I asked as I walked off the plane what time it was... 2:38. My next flight, motherfucker, was NOT delayed as I had hoped and it left at 2:50. Literally, I walked off the KC plane, walked very quickly to Gate B14, walked onto the shuttle bus, walked off at Concourse C, sprinted to Gate 10, slid through the departure gate, sprinted again down this looooonnnnnggggg ass hallway, through the doors, onto the tarmac, bounded up the steps and got in my seat. It was 2:45. I sooooo fucking rock. It is snowing like hell here now. We have at least an inch on the ground already and the wind is just bitter. Yet, at 26 degrees, I feel like I should at least put a pair of shorts on. I can't say enough about what a wonderful time I had. I look forward to more blogger meetings if I laugh as much as I did at this one. Love you guys and miss ya already!

KANSAS CITY UPDATE!

We all made it. We're all fine. Everybody forgot their cameras. We're shittin' ya. Much love from Aimee Celti Katey Jamie Bunsen PUP and me, da NannerPeach! *no Peach yogurt in this joint... WTF?*

Quizy Quiz and such...

Here's the damn quiz: 3 names you go by: 1. Trudle 2. Mommy 3. NannerPeach 3 screen names you have: 1. inanna1121 2. TDolan6331 3. n/a 3 things you like about yourself: 1. Sarcasm 2. Humor 3. 6th Sense 3 things you hate/dislike about yourself: 1. My belly 2. Smoking (but I'm working on it) 3. ADHD 3 parts of your heritage: 1. French 2. Celtic (Irish/Welsh) 3. Turkish 3 things that scare you: 1. Something happening to Nate 2. Heights 3. Suffocating 3 of your everyday essentials: 1. Coffee/Cigarettes 2. Blogging 3. Masturbating 3 things you're wearing right now: 1. Black pants 2. Sweater 3. Jewelry 3 of your favourite bands/artists: 1. Metallica 2. Velvet Revolver 3. Guns N Roses 3 of your favourite songs at present: 1. Vertigo - U2 2. Ain’t Comin’ Home - Silvertide 3. Dirty Little Thing - Velvet Revolver (My theme song) 3 new things you want to try in the next 12 months: 1. Knitting 2. Quilting 3. A real relationship 3 things you want in a relationship (love is a given): 1. Friendship 2. Loyalty 3. Laughter 2 truths and a lie:(no particular order to keep ya guessing) 1. I took German in high school. 2. I speak fluent sign language 3. My German sister speaks Spanish. 3 physical things about a love interest that appeal: 1. Taller than me 2. Big hands 3. Good teeth 3 things you just can't do: 1. Have a good relationship 2. Kiss with my eyes open 3. Not go down on a guy 3 of your favourite hobbies: (I've excluded blogging because I think that one's way too obvious) 1. Beading (or other crafts) 2. Reading 3. Sex, if I could get some. 3 things you want to do really badly right now: 1. Sex 2. Sex 3. Sex 3 careers you're considering (let's say I would consider): 1. Photojournalist 2. Forensic Anthropologist 3. Medical examiner 3 places you want to go on vacation: 1. Ireland/Scotland/Wales 2. Australia 3. Chicago 3 kids names (either boy or girl): 1. Caroline Elizabeth 2. Isabella 3. Gabriel 3 things you want to do before you die: 1. Have a good relationship 2. Have more children 3. Travel the world Something about passing this on which I’m not doing. Sue me. Its 11:01 and I haven't packed a fucking thing. I have all the shit in little piles and a note here to myself so I don't forget anything important. I was a good little girl and paid my bills online (one I dropped off) before blogging. Before Adderall, I would have talked myself out of it... except for the water bill. I would have put the rest off until I came home from Kansas City, but I said, "Naaaannnneerrrrr..." and then I answers, "Fuck, all right." I'm really tired and my head is starting to hurt. More from the fact that I'm struggling to hold it up and keep my eyes open. I'm bored. I hate packing. I have to pack Nate too. I hate packing. AZ called last night. When I saw his cell number on my Caller ID, I got that smug bitch look that men hate so much. Then... I just didn't care. I didn't feel smug. I just didn't feel much of anything, which is saddening. Its shitty to care about someone for so long and then feel nothing. I guess I was happy to hear from him. I learn a little more about the complexities of our relationship everytime we talk. I would have never been happy with him. He knew it but I didn't want to see it. He was just another guy that I couldn't have and therefore wanted with all my might. I suppose I may use that as a mechanism to keep myself from being vulnerable and actually having to commit and be intimate in a relationship. Its the same thing with Lex, except he does it me, which pisses me off, yet I have done it others, which pissed them off. I'm not sure how to break this cycle. Its not like I have men beating down my door to give it a whirl with. I know, I know... stop blogging and start going out. Newsflash - I can do both. So, I sit here on the eve of my trip to meet five of the most beautiful, strong, intelligent, funny women on Earth (and Pup too ;-), contemplating the next step of my life. Right now, its to get off my ass, go take a bath and finish packing. Like the Flylady says, "Baby steps." No orgies on Haloscan... play nice... and I'll see ya on the flipside.

Quik-E

Ew. Okay? Ew. I've been lolling around on Blogpatrol pickin' up my site stats...half of which I do not understand... M'kay? When I see this.. interesting IP address.. from NORWAY!! So, thens me figures out... whoa... I can see where they came from or somethin' referrer list whatevah. It was a Google search at 12:08 a.m. for this: uncle%20niece%20%20home%20alone%20open%20mouth%20cunt%20shower (Google) Look ya filthy bastard, you just stay in Norway M'kay? Sick fuck. Now... how in the hell did they get to MY BLOG??? That. Is. Disgusting.

Comfortable with Quirkiness

I walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. "You are such a freak!" My eyes shifted to the left, where my alter ego stood, hands on hips, smirk on her face. Normally I put Little Mizz Thang in time out if she gets on my nerves. She doesn't come around as often as she used to so I cut her some slack. Not tonight. I have a really pretty hammer... its silver with a bright orange handle. Black & Decker or some shit. Its a very pretty hammer. And I used it to bash her skull in. I really hate negative talk and I'm the Queen of Negative Self-Talk. Errrr... I used to be. Maybe I've dropped down to Lady-in-waiting, better yet, scullery maid. Yeah, scullery maid... oh, wait, no barmaid at the local pub. I LOVE those revealing cinched dresses. I can't wait to make myself one. Oh la la. Shit, I was up there... about negative talk. Stay on track here. What brought this on was Jack. Our loveable Texas narc. No, no, no, I take that back, it was Fleece. Our loveable lamb. Fleece said: "Addictive shooter...hmm, that came out all wrong. You know what I mean. And dammit if all this talk about you holding a gun in the shooting stance doesn't make you sexy." I said: "Fleece. Stop. Now. I was just about over the whole "I screwed my Sig into the back of Buddy's neck" from "Twenny Rock" and you had to bring up the whole gun, shooting stance, sexy thing. (Oh my God, I am so sad, I knew EXACTLY which post that was from!!! Note to self *GET A LIFE!!*) I'm gonna go stalk Trashman now..." This is why Little Mizz Skull-Bashed-In Thang reared her ugly head. And boy is it ugly now... hammer claw marks... not exactly a fashion statement. I realize though, that I just can't help it. I remind myself it was not my fault that I was born with a photographic memory. But, I even think that is a misnomer. I believe it is simply the way my brain processes information. I don't know how that is. I don't try, that's for sure. Yes, self, I'll admit that I've read Jack's archives a few times. Why? Because I enjoy them. I've read every Harry Potter book at least five times, if not more. I've read "The Wolf's Hour" by Robert McCammon until I had to duct tape the spine together and at least two or three pages are missing. I've read "The Outsiders" over 100 times. I've read Patricia Cornwell's books over and over as well. Sigh, but I know it's not just repetition... I can remember acute details of things from years ago. Dates.. especially dates. Numbers mean order. I assign order to my life through numbers because I have no other order. I used memorize license plates because I'm bored on the way to work. (I finally broke that habit!) I didn't re-read a lot of the archives for my Best of Blogger posts. I just filed away my favorite parts. Maybe I didn't remember the name of the post, but I can tell you what it is about and all I would have to do is read the very beginning. I knew that it was "Twenny Rock" that had the screwing Sig (damn if that's not sexy) in it but I had forgotten that it was Lane with Jack. So, its selective. Perhaps it was the image of the bald faceless goateed man named Jack who resides in our minds eye as a Texas Spiderman... errr Scorpionman... (Remember the scorpion sting? And Alex's hair stuck in it? When Jack went to pick up his brother at the airport after his dad passed away? Its called something like "God has a sense of humor" or something like that... no, no, no.. "God is a Comedian". When? After his birthday which is October 8th.. I think, but before my birthday which is November 21st.) I don't have time to look it up. Besides its posted with the Texas Contingent Best of Blogger. Back to Scorpionman... now, we don't really know what Jack looks like, its sort of a mosiac based on his descriptions, bald, goatee, and the partial pics he has posted... so, he's tall, his beard is blond, and he has beautiful arms and abs and... nevermind. But, that's not what it was about. It wasn't the physical face, it was the emotional face. The connection is made from the emotional impact of how sexy it came across that he shoved a gun in some guys neck. See, you are a freak! Thunk! Shut. Up. I know I remember things much more vividly when there is more emotion involved. I assign it significance because of that. And that may very well explain why I have such a "photographic memory," why I process information the way I do... perhaps its the empathy. I have a heightened emotional awareness. I can feel other people's feelings. Okay, but that doesn't explain how I can read an article in Reader's Digest in the late 70's, early 80's about a little boy who was killed in California. I have NEVER, EVER forgotten that little boy. That little boy named Robbie, whose parents (mother and stepfather?) abused him so badly, they killed him and then placed his body in an empty freezer and buried him. That's not a good example because it obviously had an emotional impact on me and therefore is more likely to be remembered. Maybe that's what it is... I ASSIGN some sort of emotion to what I read and what I hear so that I'm better able to remember it. Or is that why I read the same books and blogger archives again and again... to experience that emotion? To remove myself from here and place myself in another time, another place? Is that why I prefer rock music? The heat, the beat, the emotion behind it that I don't find in other music? Is that why I'm drawn to 'bad boys' or good boys with bad sides? Am I an emotion junkie? Or is it because of the lack of the physical manifestation of emotion in my life? Is it because I've never truly had a fulfilling relationship, where I've received what my soul needs? Is it the assignment of emotion... or the trickle down affect of their emotions bleeding onto me? Is that why I love sex? One of the physical manifestations of emotion, whether it be love or lust? I am an emotion junkie. And bloggers feed that like a bad case of malaria. It waxes, it wans... but it always comes back. Better than being a barmaid with a crack habit. The man who gets me is definitely going to be satisfied. He'll probably be a freak too. Thunk! Thunk! Thunk! Shut. Up. I like freaks.

I RULE!

I made it through my entire blogroll!!! Woot!! But then I forgot JamDaddy and Julie and Ashley and... oh boy and I still have those quizzes to go.. yeah, since I got pinged TWICE! But.. I'm tired. Smiles. BIG smiles.

Continuation...

From yesterday's post regarding cliques and Internet relationships... Bloggers are a clique. We are an exclusive group of people with a common interest. That entails all bloggers. All... million or more of us? Pretty big clique. The discussion in my comments went from baby oil and wiggling to the relationships that bloggers form amongst ourselves. Some bloggers, including myself, are a bit more open about who we are in "real" life. This is real life to me. This is no different than having a pen pal in Europe or Africa or Australia. You write, I write, we share. And someday, you want to meet that pen pal. You've grown together. Shared a multitude of things. Tried to help and encourage one another. We all hope for the best when we do meet. This is not what I expected when I became a blogger. I just wanted a diary and a place to post some of my poems and short stories. Before becoming a blogger, I wrote to AZ, but rarely, if ever, did he respond to what I had written. This was good at times but a lot of times it was a useless set of words that may have brought him some type of solace but did nothing for me in the long run. Some bloggers don't feel the same way I do. Whereas I do feel like I want to meet and form friendships with the people behind the blogs, some people don't. Sloth is one of those people. I respect that a great deal. I think that she summed it up correctly when she closed Slothville down (temporarily), "I hope you all continue to find what you need through this medium." And that's what it is... what we want Blogville, Blogland, the Blogosphere to be, it will be. This medium has many different uses and means different things to different people. And... frankly, there are individuals which I have attempted to form friendships with who have not responded. Some female, some male. It didn't make me angry or upset, it just was the way it was. I'm not going to stop visiting their blog or make asswipe comments, nor am I going to pester them. When I first started commenting on blogs, I didn't slide in with bells on, my ass on fire, hair standing on end... (I just do that now)... I peeked in, lurked a bit, commented here and there. Then as I read more blogs, read blogger's archives, got a feel for who they were, I started commenting more. Then, lo and behold, I actually posted an e-mail addy. And Seeker was the first person to use it. Actually, he had my e-mail addy before I ever posted it because he asked me to e-mail him and I did. As for romances... I've heard of some bloggers really hitting it off and meeting and there not be a spark one. Some, have found love. Like Gooch said, "I think there is a tendency to idealize. By that I mean it is easy to come off as a "good catch" via blogging. I can't think of anyone on my blog roll who doesn't come off to me as intelligent, thoughtful, funny, etc. But it is all that messy "real life" stuff (i.e., *DOES* my/their breath stink) that at the end of the day determines whether or not someone really is your best mate." I have to bow to Brother Gooch for his wisdom that we all know but want to forget. As I said, its interesting the perceptions that we leave of ourselves. I'm sure that at some point we have all wondered how we would get along with someone in the flesh (male or female). I'm about to find out and Kansas City may never be the same. But... have you ever wondered how you would get a long with a blogger that you sorta like but never really quite understood? Or a blogger you think is the shizznet, funny, bright.. but you know they're full of shit? Or what about the bloggers who are so humble and say, "I'm not all that." Do you wonder if they're really ALL THAT or if they're really NOT ALL THAT? For example, I have tried to explain that in person I CAN BE SHY. No one seems to believe me. Why is this??? Okay, I give, I'm not really shy... except around men and groups of people I don't know. I'll blush and stammer... its terrible. But I've learned how to overcome that... Tequila and lots of it. Then I'm 10 feet tall, bulletproof and on the prowl. Since I "know" ye bloggers, that shouldn't be a problem... but I'm still drinking the tequila. ;-) Did any of this make any sense???

MAKE JAY PAY!!! MAKE JAY PAY!!!

Jay is going to match our contributions to Savannah and her family (click title above.) Donate anytime between now and midnight Central Time on Friday the 15th. If you donate, make sure you make it plus a penny (ex. $20.01) so that bloggers will be singled out and we'll know how much to take Jay for. MAKE HIM PAY! I will be donating tomorrow as it is payday for me! Hodgepodge I have not given up my Best of Blogger posts yet. I've unfortunately got them spread out so far, work, home, slips of paper that I wasn't able to get one together last night. For those interested, next Best of Blogger will feature... the West Coast/NW bloggers...(JP, Vicki, Leese, Jeanette, Vader, Goooooch!, Aimee and Joe). Then I'll do the South/Southeast (AJ, Catt, Angi, kim, Seven, Regan, tinyhands(He shoulda been with the Texas peeps but sue me okay?) and El Sid). Then the Midwest, Northeast etc. Bear with me, might take me a while but I'll get there. Perceptions As the circle widens and I begin to e-mail and chat with bloggers outside of our blogs, I'm always shocked at the perceptions that others say I leave on my blog. One said I was mysterious... and... I just couldn't believe that. One told me who she thought my best "blogger" mates would be. Just my luck, one was married, one doesn't blog anymore and the other one... well, I still pine for him from a far. I have found who they think I'm WAY TOO MUCH WOMAN FOR. Another blogger gave me the low-down on Internet relationships and how we do tend to be more open, dropping our guard, which makes for some pretty intense emotional connections. I've never experienced any type of Internet "relationship" but I can see what he's talking about. You take out the physical, the worry over physical attributes, the "does my breath stink, is my make-up too dark, is my flab showing, do I look sexy enough, am I talking too much, am I boring, do we have a spark, does he/she want to sleep with me, should I kiss him/her" bullshit and get right to the heart of the matter and that's who we really are and hopefully, what we really think. I haven't had a relationship since I started blogging. I had one when I started though. And wouldn't you know, I stopped seeing him because he kept me at arm's length and wouldn't COMMUNICATE with me. I'm not picky about communication, write me a letter, e-mail me, chat, talk to me on the phone, face to face, smoke signals but for Christ's sake, do something!! Don't sit there like a bump on a log!!! Anyway... I read on Michelle's site that she had read on another blogger's site about "cliques" and how she didn't like visiting blogs that were a part of a "virtual community" and she was DEFYING CLIQUES. Well, have at it honey, but don't rain on our parade. Furthermore, I don't believe I've ever belonged to a "clique" and if I did, it wasn't the popular one. This is not high school sweetie, we're not going to stare and point if you wear the wrong kind of shoes or your hair has a bad perm. Geez, I think we're a pretty nice bunch of peeps and definitely worth wiggling in amongst. Ha! Look at Seven and Lois... wiggled right in. Why? They're great writers, funny, friendly and, most importantly, crazy. I feel great!! HAPPY MONDAY!!!

God's Eye block - the HARD one 

Another pic. 

Quilts Are the Fabric of Family

Whew! Was yesterday a day or WHAT? Glad everyone, Lump, Bump, and Savannah, are holding their own. (Hope Jasmine puts her feet up today.) Last night, after receiving three tons of glorious news, I re-doubled my efforts to piece together the HARD quilt block. You can click through to see what a finished quilt would look like. I took a picture but its at home on my digi. I'm sure the picture sucks but I'll post it later. I'm actually QUITE PROUD of this block. I'm in love with it. AIMMEEEEE... is going to help with the piecing of the quilt while we are in Kansas City, you know, in between the drinking and eating and gossiping and looking at pics and running around the city. She's also sewing a few of the blocks and is giving me tips and pointers. She's good that way. We've decided to make it with 6 X 6 blocks instead of the larger 12 X 12 I posted earlier. I told her that I wanted to make sure that any one who donated fabric would have at least one block for each fabric sent. I'm sure with the peeps who have contacted me that we will have enough fabric combined to make each quilt, which will be 48 blocks a quilt. (Which is, of course, subject to change again.) We considered using Trashman's fabric for the backing since its probably going to be something cool,like zebra stripes, snake skin or leopard print. Hee hee. I'm hoping it gets here before I leave. Speaking of... taking off at 10:15 on Friday!!!! (Huge inward scream and stomping of feet.) Speaking of fabric... I told Cybele in my e-mail to her that I suspect I will have quite a bit of fabric left over and if anyone wants whats left back, tough shit. I will continue to work on quilts and then either donate them to the local NICU/PICU or send them to UNC, where Savannah is, for other transplants patients. Let's spread the love shall we? I can't tell you how excited I am about this!!! Like I said before, I've always wanted to make a quilt and frankly, I never thought I would have the talent or patience to do it. More and more its looking to be a reality. I would like to use some of the fabric to finish a quilt with the HARD blocks and the enter it in the quilt contest at the Black Walnut Festival. This takes place about eight miles from where my parents live. My mom entered several things last year (flowers, jams, jellies etc. and won several blue ribbons... go MOM!) You can sell the quilts if you want so if anyone wants it... they can't have it. Oh, you know I'll end up selling it and then donating the money. I mean, if it looks good enough to sell. The big question right now is whether I will quilt it on the machine or by hand. My mom has a quilting loom that she got from my grandmother. I can remember watching my Ma-Maw and either my mom, or one of my aunts, or all the above, quilt on the loom. My Ma-Maw also sewed all of her quilt pieces by hand. Damn, I just got a big lump in my throat. I remember her hands, soft and wrinkled, a little knarled from arthritis, a thimble on her right ring finger as she deftly, practically without looking, pricked the material and pulled the needle through the bottom and the search of the needle point up and down, up and down until she found just the right place to pull it back up. And it went on and on, methodic and mesmerizing. I still miss her so much. I find myself, the older I get, drawing closer to my mom and especially the "old ways." Its funny being so "old-fashioned" about some things yet entirely NOT "old-fashioned" in others. That's the way though, that families used to spend time together, especially when you have 14 grandchildren and a trip to the Grand Caymans is out of the budget. We had family reunions and Sunday dinners, we ate hotdogs and hamburgers when you still used charcoal in the grill, watermelon that was chilled in a cooler of ice and my aunt's dog would chase us all over the hillside. The older people, who were actually quite young at the time, but seemed old, sat around in lawn chairs under the shade trees and drank sweet iced tea (or beer if we were at my great-aunt's). Everyone brought a covered dish and someone made fried chicken and asked if my Ma-Maw (or Aunt Mattie) had brought her chicken and dumplings and did so-and-so make their German Chocolate cake. You have to understand that in my Ma-Maw's family, the oldest grandchild was only 9 years younger than my Mom's younger sister and the oldest great-grandchild was only a year younger than the youngest grandchild. And since my Ma-Maw had a sister and three brothers who lived here and my Pa-Paw had two of three of each around, and add in the halfs and cousins, plus the fact we're all inter-related, and all around the same age in each family... well, that was a hell of a lot of people. Relatives came from far and wide... friends of the family even came. Babies were passed around and kissed and pissed off from the heat. We sweated and laughed and played tag and swam in the river, and went boating and climbed mountains and got to know each other again. Now, the biggest family reunion we have is when someone dies. I really miss the "old" days.

Inanna's Best of Blogger - Part Tres (Philosophical Thursday)

I was too busy chatting last night to blog. Yep, I was chatting with bloggers. I'm on Yahoo and AIM so if anyone wants to add me or have me add them, e-mail me and we'll exchange screen names. Nate and I went out to pass a ball last night. Its just unseasonably warm here. It was 65 last night. Obscene and makes me worry about what's going to happen later. We always get hit later. I have instructed Pup to get rid of the bad weather up there so I can make it for the Kansas City trip. Passing the ball actually helped my shoulder a bit but made my cramps worse. Go figure. I was sitting on the bed with Nate cutting out quilt pieces while he read the game book on "The Incredibles." He suddenly looked up and said, "Mommy, you have got to see "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air," it is soooo funny!" I looked over and smiled. I said, "Dude, that was on TV when I was younger. You're watching re-runs." He cocked his head and asked, "Wow, was it in color?" Wha, wha, whaaaaa... I never realized how much faith I had until another blogger started asking me questions about how I deal with loss and pain in my life. It was hard for me to answer her questions about my beliefs because they're so ingrained that I can think of no other way to be and therefore do not consciously think of them and explaining them is even more difficult. I think the main question though, is how I deal with not having a significant other in my life. I'll admit that I get lonely. But I've been lonelier in shitty relationships than I have being by myself. I won't say I've reached a Zen spot but I can say that I'm more comfortable about who I am and what I want in my relationships. I feel if I put myself out there more I would have a much greater opportunity to meet people. We are only limited by ourselves and everything else is an excuse. And, I never give up. Perhaps its my personality, mixed with a undying belief that people get what's coming to them eventually, whether good or bad. I never give up. I almost gave up once and I swore I would never allow myself to get that low again. I'm like Jason and Freddy and Michael. I just keep coming back and coming back. I'm just much prettier and nicer than they are. But I can channel them when I have to. I don't like to have to but I will. I will not be run over, I will not be run down, I will not allow others to define my worth. Plus, if we could look inside of some of the idyllic lives that we treasure from afar... trust me... they are neither idyllic nor a treasure. Whatever they show to the outside, like all of us, there is that much more on the inside. Speaking of Michael... his leaving has left a huge hole in me. I miss him. I try not to go by his place to see if he is around or has been by, but I do. I have to tell you guys about this client I have. She and her husband were involved in a car accident, in which the driver of their vehicle had popped a Soma before attempting to drive them to work. This Einstein decides to attempt to pass two vehicles on a double yellow on one of the most dangerous roads in WV, if not the US. Wayne Concrete of Barboursville, WV has been hammering hard to remove a 700' long, 100' high rock cliff along State Route 10 in Logan County. According to Bud Daniels, President of Wayne Concrete, this has been a problem spot for the past 80 years–at most, the width of the road at this dangerous point is a lane and a half. I was on this road before they removed the cliff... terrifying. Anyway, said Einstein loses control and flips the truck five or six times. This lady settles with the insurance company immediately but her husband hires us. Sissy goes out to sign this folks up. She said they lived on a muddy hill in a trailer so old it must have been built when God was a boy, coon hounds baying... you get the point. Yet inside they have two computers, a DVD player, surround sound, plasma TV... again, you get the point. Druggity-drug-drug dealers. About six weeks later the hubby dies of a drug overdose and she's about two breaths away from one herself. Here's the interesting part... she says someone broke into their home and injected methamphetamine into their heels and that's what killed him and almost her. Yeah. Right. When you talk to her on the phone, you are timed and then we make it a game to see how many times she repeats herself and how many times we have to tell her how there is a cap of 20K. That's all. Nothing more. Sue for the assets of the guy who was driving? Yeah. Right. His totaled pickup truck and the cash value of his meth? Yeah. Right. And if you don't think I know what you tweakers were doing all hanging out together in your Holler Mansion, guess again. I read Jack and Jack knows. And please, don't tell me how much you miss your husband and how your whole life is ruined, and your kid's life is ruined (not his kid)and how you'll never recover from this as your newest boy toy turns over in bed to hand you the phone. Welcome to my world. I'm afraid you may be somewhat disappointed with today's Best of Blogger. Its just one person. One person who I feel is in a class all by themselves. I'm talking about Rita from Diary-A. Rita's life story (Parts 1-59) are currently posted but she's had to take a hiatus because her dad is very, very ill. Rita has a voice that is fresh and honest. Brutally honest, even about herself. Her life story makes mine look like I was raised with a silver spoon in my mouth and still have it there. She's an incredible writer. Yes, she does it for a living but we all know that writing about our lives is a little different. Rita is beyond words. I could say so much, but it would never, ever be enough. You will not be sorry if you take the time to read her archives. Much love Bloggies!!

Inanna's Best of Blogger - Part Deux (and More)

A thousand pardons my friends... I almost gave up on you tonight. What a wuss I am huh? I mean, I only woke up at six this morning and came in and read Jay's blog, because that's what I do. Then I read Steve's blog, because that's what I do. Then I check my own blog, because that's what I do. Then I surf blogs and check my e-mail. Then I go back to bed for as long as I can roll over and hit the snooze button until I HAVE to get up. It was raining this morning so naturally the drive in was a bit slower but I still got to work five minutes early, yay for me. I worked today. No, for real. In between the multitude of e-mails and IMs, I actually worked. I also have started making a to-do list every evening before I leave work so its ready in the morning. I increased my Adderall from 10 to 15 by popping a capsule open and dumping half in a shot glass and then putting the pill back together. This is inefficient and I think it throws the medicine off. You have to be careful with this stuff. So, I increased it again to 20 mg. I didn't think I would need it this high but by Golly Jingos... its working. I'm noticing these changes in myself without even trying. Like, the to-do list. Granted, I only got 3 out of 5 things done, but that's more than I was doing before. It just dawned on me to do this. Not that I haven't thought of to-do lists, I just never could utilize them before. My new to-do list has today's left-overs and tomorrow's goals... yay. Then, after working all day, without a lunch, I came home and picked up the mail, went to the bank, came home and started working on my quilt block (the first one.) Wow. I would like to finish this first (really hard)one, just to see what it would look like. But, I'm totally out of my league with it. I dropped down to another design and was able to get all of the pieces cut out but not sewn together. Its posted at the bottom. While working on that, Nate and TLC got into it at TLC's house and Nate slammed the door over there. I could hear the whole thing through the vent on my a/c. Then TLC's dad yells at Nate about slamming the door. When Nate gets here, I very sternly jump his shit again. I don't care how asinine that whole family is and how TLC is with our things, but that is no excuse for Nate to be an ass himself. So, then Nate is upset and wants to walk to the grocery store to get some bread for a PB&J. I get my pedometer, my shoes and bra back on and we take off in a light drizzle. The nearest store is... by my pedometer calculations... one tenth of a mile. I'm not sure about that. We come home in a light shower and I made Nate his sandwhich then go back to my material. Then its time for dinner. I made grilled chicken breasts with garlic salt and mac and cheese. Nate had his night-time meds and we ate dinner on the bed watching Lord of the Rings. This is the 3rd night in a row that I have made dinner. Amazing. Okay, I did forget to take out the garbage and I didn't clean any more of the kitchen... but I'm seeing improvements. As Trashman would say... keep on, keepin' on. So, Nate lays down to go to sleep about 9:00 and I come back to the computer and the material. By midnight, I have the pieces cut out, I clean my desk a bit, I take a pic and post it and I'm ready for bed!! But, I know I promised the next in my blogger series and I remembered I had two beers chilling in the freezer, so I suddenly obtained a second wind... AND HERE ME AM!! In doing this Best of Blogger series, I realized I know some pretty cool peeps and, I spend ALOTTA GODDAMN TIME IN TEJAS! I probably spend more time there than I do at home. Sad but true. So, Inanna's Best of Blogger proudly presents Part Deux - The Texas Contingent...(somebody pass the tequila). Jack’s Texas Music: Posts of distinction: Bada Bing (May 23), Meth, Lies and Videotape (June 24), May the Foce Be With You (June 30), I'm a Trained Professional (July 8), Road Rage (August 23), Las Vegas aka Security! (September 7), Strength (October 24), God is a Comedian (October 26), Attack of the Secret Recipe (November 18), and more recently A New Number One (December 10). Jack has that rare ability to enslave me to his writing and nauseate me at the same time. You know you're my favorite Jack, just don't tell Jay, he'll think I'm taking up for ya. Jay’s Party: * Note - Jay's blog is one of the very first I ever started reading and commenting on.* Posts of distinction: Cheetos and Porn (June 10), Squat (June 11), Little Fucker Lied to Me (June 15), Dinner With a Side of Chickenshit (June 19), Naked Threat (July 3), Crotch Monkey (July 10), Own That Shit (July 20), Outwitted by Women (July 25), Nose Strips from Hell (August 13), Should Have Pissed in the Bushes (September 8), Who's Your Daddy? (November 22), and Will You Marry Me (January 3). *Nother Note - As I read Jay's "Will You Marry Me?" post again today, I was struck by how, even though I knew the answer, my heart was pounding and I got tears in my eyes. WTG man.* Doing Time: Trashman: Posts of distinction: Miracle on 21st Avenue (July 29), Life on the Line (Series beginning October 7), Tattooed Steel and Sex Appeal (November 2), and Retribution (December 14). GOOD MORNING SUNSHINE!! The Society Page: Kristin: Red White Black and Blue (November 8), Snap, Crackle, Pop and The Case of the Stolen Latte (December 10), Oops She Did It Again and Again and Again (December 13), and 2 Alarm, 2nd Date (December 31). Sleeping Ugly: Zelda: Posts of Distinction: Heat Wave (October 1, '03), I sprained my tongue on Valentine's Day (February 16), Ok, So I'm Drunk (June 25), Power of the ..... (June 21), Dirty Old Man (August 30), Alternatives (September 27), and More On Being Married (Which Includes Sex) (October 10). Chirotechnics: Jethro: Posts of distinction: A Little History About Me (September 24), The Car Ride Home (September 22), Backfired (October 16), Touche' (November 6) and The Parade (November 26). GOD BLESS TEJAS!!!

First quilt block pieced but not sewn. This is my "practice block." These colors suck! The maroon looks much better than this and the middle piece is a very nice gold/dark green/light green pattern. The corners are off-white.  

Inanna's Best of Blogger - Part Uno (And More)

*LONG ASS POST!* Definitely gonna get your money’s worth tonight. Settle back. Its gonna be fun. First, the book. Esther has “Boys Life” by Robert McCammon listed on her wish list and since I have the book and have read it half a million...errr dozen times, I offered to send it to her. I asked her though, if she would, to agree to send it to another blogger once she was finished. Which she did and she also agreed to send me a book as well, which I will also pass on. Now, I will write my blog name and URL and a short message inside the book and I asked her to do the same before she sends it on. Hopefully, at the end of this year, the last person will e-mail me and tell me they have the book and find out where to send it. I would also like if they pinged my blog each time the book changed hands, just so I could keep up with it... but may be asking too much. Once she finishes the book and I finish hers, we’ll post on our sites and give peeps the opportunity to say... ME! Me! Me! I want it!!! And then I’ll draw your names out of a hat and send it on. Corny, cheesy? Yeah, so what? Next, the quilt(s). Long story... sorta. Without getting full on into everything that Angi and I have discussed... I will share part of the story with you and how it fits into this deal. I was attempting to explain what it is I do when I ‘connect’.. (Thanks to Julie for that word) to people... here and, sometimes, beyond. Here is what I wrote: ...Regardless, it was time to pull out the heavy artillery and take a deeper journey, one I don’t take very often. The last time I took this journey is when T-Bird’s great-aunt was in hospice. She was barely clinging to life and it was one of those situations where it was just a matter of time, yet she kept hanging on and hanging on. Finally, T-Bird’s mom asked that I go to the hospice with her and see if I could determine why she wouldn’t cross over. Again, it is difficult to describe what I do when I do it. Its the same when I read cards. Its a zone. I’m here but I’m not here. Its like I’m lighter, for lack of a better explanation. And even though I may see them in my mind’s eye, I know its not really their body, its only a representation. I saw their Aunt standing by a lighted door. As in, THE lighted door. A representation of the Other Side. I asked her why she wouldn’t cross. She told me it was because she couldn’t find her son. He had died six months earlier and she had always taken care of him and she wasn’t leaving without him, if she could help it. Again, she didn’t actually “say” anything, it was a feeling that I interpreted. I spent a lot of time trying to talk her across. I reminded her of the rest of her family waiting there for her. She would look through the door and kept telling me, “he’s not there, he’s not there.” I had no desire to find him at all. I didn’t need a spirit such as his attaching itself to me for any reason. No thank you. I wished her well. She died over a week later and I know its because the body finally pushed the spirit out. The most terrible thing about it was that later, T-Bird’s sister, who is also a medium, found him. He was still in his bedroom at his mom's house. They immediately called me to ask how to get rid of him. I just told them to tell him that his mom was gone, she had crossed over and he needed to do the same. They, like me, had no desire to communicate with him and simply didn’t move into the house. Needless to say, he wasn’t a very nice person while a walking, talking, breathing individual and none of us were willing to tangle with his spirit either. So... I have wobbled back and forth on this for the past day or so. I have always wanted to make a quilt. My grandmother did it, her mother did it etc. And my mom has and my aunts have. For one thing, I want to continue this family tradition. Its inherently Appalachian to make quilts and I hate to see the old ways die. Since I learned the basics of my sewing machine this would definitely keep me from having to hand sew all of the pieces. (Like my great-grandma did.) And... here’s the wobbly part... I want to make one for Savannah (that’s where it started) and then I decided that I wanted to make one for her brother as well. If two children have been through it, its those two. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to post about it and then I figured if anyone wanted to contribute fabric that it would be nice to give you the opportunity. Then I thought about just saying I was making a quilt and if you wanted to participate, fine, and not say why. I know, I’m strange... I have my reasons. I wasn’t so much worried about the material. Frankly, I have enough clothes in my attic that don’t fit me and in the bag to go to Goodwill that I probably would have enough material to make at least the individual blocks... I would just need a border which would tie it together. What I was worried about was... the other materials. Thread, pins, needles, etc. Given that I may have a multitude of colors in the quilt, that could mean a lot of thread. May not seem like much, but when you live on a crappy budget, sometimes, in reality, there isn’t money for a $1.00 spool of thread. (Don’t feel sorry for me. I have a lot of wealth, just not money and I ALWAYS FIND A WAY.) So, I came home and in keeping with trying to turn over a new leaf to restore order to my home, I moved a box of stuff, emptying it and got that monstrosity out of my doorway. I needed to find my black notebook too, which I knew was buried under the rubble somewhere. I did find it and when I did, my toe hit something on the floor. I looked down and saw a Danish Butter Cookie tin. I picked it up and shook it. It sounded like the cookies were petrified (which would not be out of the ordinary around here.) That’s what I expected to see when I popped the top of the cookie tin. But instead, I found spools and spools of thread, and pins, and not just any needles, but quilting needles, and an old-fashioned-made-from-iron-no-needle-piercing thimble. And they belonged to T-Bird’s aunt. That’s where she fits in this whole thing. So, I tell Angi about T-Bird’s aunt, and about the quilts, and then I worry about finding the stuff and having the materials and it is provided. Now, is that a damn sign or what? So, I’m making quilts. If you would like to contribute that would be fantastic. If not, stand over there --------> and yell encouragement. Thanks. Now, on to YOU!! I will be breaking my Best of Blogger posts up into several. I have other things on my mind so there will be interruptions. Additionally, I have not put links to the posts. I’m sorry. Sorry!!! The first four come from bloggers who have, for one reason or another, decided to stop blogging or take extended breaks. No, I have not included Kevin. Without further delay, here’s Part Uno of Inanna’s Best of Blogger. Slow Adventures in Slothville: Posts of distinction: Sloth’s pet peeve list (Grumpy Sloth - June 22) and her encounter with high school students on her trip to Australia (Bouncing Around Down Under... The Covers... I Wish - July 1), Warning: Serious and Personal Post (July 15), Clean Dirty Clean (August 17), and Moving Day (September 1). MakeMineMike: Posts of distinction: Pinch Me (March 17) - heh, he forgot to wear green *giggle* , Bathroom Etiquette (June 10), The Feline Dealbreaker (August 19) *stupid girl*, ER Visit (September 23), Bathroom Etiquette 2 aka Mike’s Peculiarities aka the NannerPeach Post (October 26), Mike and Mike and the Stairs (November 1), and Mike’s Ginormous Anatomy (November 22). Mike doesn’t title his posts so I got to make up my own!! Phoebe Moons: Posts of Distinction: Sugar High (June 21), The Littlest Birds (July 29), Dirty and India (July 14), and More Pregnancy News (October 18). Aliens, Guns & Boobs: The Dastard: Posts of Distinction: Three Things, then a Declaration, an Announcement, a Wish, and an Admonition (July 2), Little Homo (October 29), and Charla, Midterm, Porn :( and NO Politics (November 12). (Photo below of my discovery today and if you didn't read Jeanette's comment on *Drumming Fingers*, do so... its funnier than the post!)

One spool was not even opened and some of these are vintage threads.. they are on the original wooden spools. The thread still looks great though.